Day 4 and 5 getting stronger
Thursday night
I’m up late preparing the materials for tomorrows lessons, reviewing the lesson plans, tweaking all the Classcraft levels and requests, answering all emails, and now fine tuning the assignments in Google Classroom so they are accurate. I’m also trying to upload the simulations and presentations I make in class, so each student can see and review them after the lesson. All of this work takes a considerable amount of time, and I almost lost my writing streak over it.
The students asked me to come to their instrumental concert tonight, but I am way too busy and tired to do that this time. After school some students came to talk to me about some favoritism they perceive, they had good points. It is awesome to have honest students and all you can say is “I’ll try to do better, try to see it from my point of view, too.” The students need for approval and encouragement could not be any clearer though. The reality of my life is nagging and cajoling students to be quiet and still for long enough to think about the concepts and activities I’m leading. It’s hard to be Mr. Wonderful when it feels like your world is falling apart. I have to go and restudy the classroom management stuff I should know so well.
Anyway the lessons went ok, i’m getting closer to my goal, so a good day.
Saturday morning :
Sleeping in on Saturday is a wonderful feeling. We have a three day weekend (and a four day week). So much happened on Friday I can barely remember. I worked my morning period prepping and cleaning and it was over soon enough. I determined not to let the 8th grade class mess up my peace as that kills me for the whole day. I set up an assignment for them in Google Classroom, set out the Newtons Cradle, posted the Agenda. They did about half of what I was aiming for, but thats better than nothing. The IQWST is a bit crazy- “glue a 2 inch piece of a straw to a balloon and then run string through it’? Tried it and as expected the glue failed immediately- I’ll use tape as common sense dictates. How can such shoddy teacher materials and instructions make it to the Curriculum Guides for what is supposed to be the most NGSS-aligned curriculum?
In my 6th grade classes I needed to finish the lesson from Thursday before dedicating to Genius Hour. I did a good job of pushing the instruction along, giving the students plenty of chances to discuss with each other, write in their journals and show their work on the document camera. What a difference the quality of the GEMS Teachers Guide makes when planning and delivering instruction! None of it is easy, but at least it’s clear. The experiments I’ve led for the first two lessons have both not gone as desired, but the simulations and clear directions cover for it.
By 5th period I kind of gave up on the passion projects as there is no way to shoehorn it in the way I imagined. Also I was disheartened when I asked students if they were excited about it and I got a chorus of “no”s. There are a few students in each class who want to do it but most seem disgusted by the idea of work. If they won’t play along with the passion project then they’re going to have to do a traditional science fair project. Either way I can see that it’s going to be a tough sell and I have to think it through very carefully.
Two more students were added to my Per 4 class today, taking it up to 42. I only have 36 seats and this class needs lots of academic assistance and several students routinely act in a rude and disruptive manner. One student appears obviously gifted and I spoke with an administrator to have him moved to an honors class. Every day I do so many little things to try and connect with my colleagues, advocate for my students, be approachable open and honest. I’m doing the best I can. I just know I can do better if I had more collaboration and support at the school, and LESS students! I am stretched way too thin to the point of breaking and I don’t know how much longer I can withstand the stress. I have to do what everyone does: compromise the quality of instruction, compromise the quality of feedback for student work, compromise the quality of grading, ignore the cleanliness and order of the classroom etc It’s like a systemic conspiracy to inflict mediocrity and break the heart and spirit of an ambitious and dedicated teacher.
That sounds so sad but it is the reality of the job and has been for quite some time. This is why most teachers quit and why those that don’t often become jaded and cynical. You know how politics tends to corrupt people as they get more and more entrenched in the system? Same thing here really. It becomes about CYA and the more you excel, the more punishment you receive. You work well with kids? Great, here’s more of them. You earn NBC? Great, let’s move you to a “higher needs” school whenever we feel like it. If you have less than 35 kids in one class they can use the difference to justify packing too many kids into another class.
I hope I am done complaining and can focus on the positive things I am doing and trying to do in the weeks ahead. My plan is to begin to attack the prompts for the NBC Component 4 and post my work as I progress. If anyone is actually reading this, I admire your bravery as much as I admire my own for posting this.
